Sunday, December 30, 2012

Pain

Well I doubt anyone reads this blog anymore as I have been MIA for quite some time, But I miss the therapy that writing down the simple little things in my life brings. So 2013 I am turning over a new leaf, starting fresh, and taking time for the things that make me happy. The last couple years have been well hard, but they have been for almost everyone I know. It seems people are being tried in so many different ways. Trails that are seen and obvious or trials that are hidden and secret. Both very real and very hard. I am reminded of a quote I found on pinterest that reads

"The prettiest smiles hide the deepest secrets. The prettiest eyes have cried the most tears, and the kindest hearts have felt the most pain."

There have been days that I feel my heart was broken and wasn't sure how long it would take to fix it, or if it could even be fixed in this lifetime. I have felt hurt so deep that it literally felt as though I was breaking into tiny pieces.

But I realize it is at these moments that if we allow it, we become closer to God. We understand the atonement a little better, and start to see a glimpse into what our Savior Jesus Christ did for us. That light (no matter how small) starts to peak through the clouds. Hope is reborn.

I don't feel put back together yet but I do feel I am on the mend, I feel closer to my Father in Heaven, and my Savior. I also feel that I have an added depth to my soul I understand things and people a little bit better. I am so thankful for this life the opportunities and experiences that ultimately will shape us into the people that God intends us to be.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Pavilions

Pavilion Hall Canton Tx | East Texas #1 Pavilion Hall  Image
"Our own desires, rather than a feeling of "Thy will be done," create a feeling of a PAVILION blocking God.  God is not unable to see us or communicate with us, but we may be unwilling to listen or submit to His will and His time." (Where is the Pavilion; Henry B. Eyring)


There have been different times in my life where I feel distant from my Father in Heaven, I feel He is so far away, I realize it is usually when things aren't going as planned and I feel upset, sad, or mad at the situation. It is at these times that I need God the most. I want to work on not being so stubborn and realizing that this is the Lords way for me.  Yes easier said than done, but will make life so much easier:)

"We remove the Pavilion when we feel and pray, 'Thy will be done" AND "in Thine own time." His time should be soon enough for us since we know that He wants only what is best." (Where is the Pavilion; Henry B. Eyring)


Thursday, August 9, 2012

Moments of Beginnings and Endings


"Yes there will be moments of beginnings and moments of endings throughout our lives, but these are only markers along the way of the great middle of our eternal lives.  Whether we are at the beginning or the end, whether we are young or old, the Lord can use us for his purposes if we simply set aside whatever thoughts limit our ability to serve and allow His will to Shape our lives."
Dieter F. Uchtorf (Always in the Middle)

* This talk has been particularly helpful to me lately as I am struggling a little with the fact that we are done having children. ( due to health reasons) I have gone through so many emotions, as I feel its not fair, or what else am I supposed to be doing with this time of my life? I'm only 27 years old. I was always that girl who loved to babysit, loved little kids and told everyone I wanted 8 kids someday:) (Now don't get me wrong I am so very thankful for my 3 beautiful girls I have been miraculously blessed with) But sometimes it is just hard when the "moments of endings" are not planned to come so quickly.  I just love this quote so much because I realize that I don't need to dwell long on those feelings of loss. There is much to do while here on this Earth, we have to set aside those thoughts that limit our ability. I am so thankful for this gospel, the hope, peace, comfort.... completeness it brings into my life.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Angels

This is taken from a talk that Elder Russell Nelson gave at my Grandma Turleys funeral. I wanted to share because it really opened my mind about Loved ones who have passed on, he said concerning Grandma and concerning all loved ones who have passed on:

"Now you sons and daughters be assured that she is still your mother and she can still mother you through the veil.  She is not far away.  Joseph F. Smith said this, "surely those who have passed beyond can see more clearly through the veil back here than is possible for us to see them from our sphere of action." I think that if we move and had our being in the presence of Heavenly messengers and of Heavenly beings we are not separated from them, we cannot forget them,  we do not cease to love them we always hold them in our hearts and memory and thus we are associated and united with them through ties we cannot break.  Those who have been faithful and have gone beyond can see us better than we can see them.  WE LIVE IN THEIR PRESENCE.  They see us. They solicit to our welfare they love us now more than ever.  Their desire for our well being must be greater than that which we feel for ourselves.  SO BE ALERT, be attentive, part of those promises about Heavenly angels being round about you to bear you up will be those angels you love most."

Whenever I read this it brings tears to my eyes, Oh how thankful I am for the Gospel of Jesus Christ. For the peace and comfort it can bring to saddened hearts. I miss Grandma Turley, but I know she is close. Also a couple of months ago I lost a dear Uncle of mine (Well he is Tyler's uncle but I claim him as my own:) Uncle Donny is a great man, I know alot of people were sad to see him go, He has a way of making others feel they are one of his most favorite people:) He was one of my zipper buddies (zipper buddy is one who has a scar from open heart surgery hence the zipper:) I wanted his family to know how much I love, admire, and respect them. They are all just like he is, amazing people. I know he is close to you, and there helping you just as he always has been.
And anyone else who has lost a loved one, they truly are round about. They love you more now than ever. I know this is true. What peace this knowledge can bring!